How to overcome heartbreak

Dealing with heartbreak and overcoming heartbreak can be incredibly challenging and painful experience.

Whether it is the end of a relationship, loss of a close one, shattering of dreams or betrayal the emotional toll it takes on us can be overwhelming.

Coping with heartbreak requires time, self-compassion and thoughtful process to healing.

While there is no one-size-fits-all solution, the following suggestion can provide you with a roadmap to the journey of self-growth, recovery and healing.

I know how difficult and suffocating the feeling is and I wish that no one ever had to suffer from it.

But if you are already in pain and want some healing you can try some of the methods mentioned below. Number 10 is the most effective one. Take your time and read it through.

If even after trying all these methods you feel sad and depressed, I recommend you to take some counselling class.

What to do to get over heartbreak

1. Accept the cause of your heartbreak

You may resist a lot at first and may feel that you did not deserve it. You tend to keep questioning yourself “is this actually happening to me?”

When we feel bad about a particular situation our tendency may be to sugar coat it with justifications.

Questions we ask ourselves when something breaks our heart

How could this happen to me?
Why is such thing happening to me?
Am I stupid?
Is this actually happening to me?
But why did they do this?
am I crazy to think and to feel in this way?

So many questions with so many versions of answers may be running on your mind. But the best thing to do is just accept that it has happened.

However ugly the thing may be that has happened to you, you just need to accept that yes such and such thing has happened to me.

You may feel hurt, betrayed, and stupid. It may hurt your ego or self-respect to accept that you were treated wrong.

But just accept it.

It is okay to be vulnerable with yourself.

“With acceptance comes clarity.”

2. Take a break from social media when dealing with heartbreak

Do yourself a favor and deactivate all your social media accounts for a few days. You can even uninstall them for a while.

Using social media too much can even make a normal, jolly person feel sad and depressed. You can imagine what it can do to a person who is already suffering.

We come across a variety of content on our news feed while using social media.

You never know what may trigger you and act as a fuel to the fire that is already burning you.

Stay away from any such thing at least for some days.

This will help you keep your sanity intact.

You can do this!

3. Try to see things from their perspective

We sometimes misjudge a situation and overreact. If someone’s act is bothering, you and you are close to this person you can always clear it out by talking to them.

But if you are not on speaking terms, you can try to analyze the situation from their perspective.

Try to put yourself in their shoes and see if you would’ve done the same thing as they did.

If the answer is yes, then there you are with the explanation that you needed.

But if you still feel that what they did was wrong and that you would not have done the same even if you were in their shoes, then my dear you know where they stand in your life now.

Life is vibrant and we make many social connections. Not all people we meet are worthy to be called a friend.

I read somewhere that we should normalize terms like acquaintance, neighbor, colleague, classmate. Not everyone we meet is our friends.

This line makes so much sense to me now. You should know where people stand in your life. Treat them according to that and expect to be treated the same way.

Also, it becomes a lot easier to forgive someone when you know their part of story. And forgiving them is one major way you can heal your heart. You can also have a look at How to forgive someone who is not sorry.

4. Talking to a friend can help you with your heartbreak

Having a friend with whom you can share your feelings is one of the most wonderful blessings one can have.

if you have such friends, i urge you to go and talk to them about how you are feeling.

Of course you cannot keep them occupied talking about yourself all day long, but just by sharing your feelings for a brief time can make you feel much better.

Whenever you feel victimized and are dwelling in self-loathing, you should talk to a friend.

A friend is someone who knows and appreciates the goodies that you are made of. She/he will remind you of exactly what a wonderful person you are.

Having a good friend is one of the best things in this world. They help you remember all your beautiful virtues and assist you in regaining your confidence.

They boost you up. And help you see the truth more clearly.

5. Spend some time in the nature

Nature has the power to heal you. spending time in nature can ease your heart ache. I have personally experienced it so many times.

When we spend time in nature, we come closer to our creator. We are made aware that this world is a huge and indeed a beautiful place where our heartbreak seems like a small issue.

Some of the things I like to do are

I bask in the sun.
let the wind cleanse me in a windy environment.
take a walk to a green area.
enjoy the sunset and let the heart break set along with it.
Hear the birds chirping.
view the sunrise and visualize it as a new beginning of your life.

All these activities usually leave me feeling fresh and alive and grateful just to be alive and breathing.

6. Moving physically helps you deal with heartbreak

” Move physically to move mentally. “

Moving physically can make a shift in your energy and can help you make a mental shift as well.

You can try out light exercises, walk or even clean your space.

Just don’t lie in your bed all day long thinking about your heartbreak and about your misfortune.

The sooner you get your body moving the better you will feel.

Visit a new place, go for hiking if possible. Just try and move your body.

7. Indulging in self-care activities in necessary when dealing with heartbreak

When dealing with heartbreak take time to indulge yourself in self-care.

Taking care of yourself should be your first priority at such times.

Heartbreak not only impacts your mental health but there is also a huge impact on you physically.

Your body may become weak and sensitive when you are dealing with heart break.

You may lose your appetite and sleep.

Here are some of the ways you can take care of yourself:

Selfcare ideas when dealing with heartbreak

Eat nutritious food. Keep yourself hydrated.
Take hot water bath.
Watch movies which sends out positive messages on the similar topic you are dealing with.
Exercise.

To know more about self-care habits that cater to your well being check out self care habits to upgrade your life.

7. Take your heartbreak as a sign to level up in life

Every set back in life is an opportunity for you to grow and level up.

Not only heart break but any obstacle put in your path is put for a reason.

Obstacles come so that we may learn something from them and become a better person.

You should always strongly believe in your heart that “whatever happens, happens for good”

It may not make sense to you right away, but your heartbreak is also there to teach you something and it is just a lesson learnt the hard way.

If you refuse to learn anything from it, life will continue to put you in such situation until you learn the lesson it is trying to teach you.

So, take every heartbreak as an opportunity to outgrow yourself and to level up.

Trust yourself. “The task that is put in front of you is never beyond your strength.”

8. Let all of your feelings and pain out

Whenever we are feeling low just letting out our thoughts can give us much solace.

Instead of keeping it all inside and letting it eat your mental peace just let it out.

When you are hurt by an incident or by someone’s actions you naturally tend to have a lot of thoughts, questions and self-explanations.

The best thing for you to do is let it all out.

You can talk to your friend, family of whoever your confidant is. But be careful of whom you let out your thoughts to.

You should only share your vulnerability with someone you can trust and whom you consider as a well-wisher. Else, it may backfire, and that person’s opinion or reaction may hurt you even more.

If you are not sure that you can share it with anyone, you can also journal your thoughts in your diary.

Your diary can be a safe place for you to let out your thoughts without any shame or fear of judgement.

It will help you to get some clarity of your feelings and make you feel lighter.

It is truly said “if you can write down your problems clearly, you are halfway there to solving it.”

9. Practice self-recognition to counter negative feelings of a heartbreak

Self-recognition can help you bring back your self-confidence.

Whenever we are slapped with a heartbreak, we tend to question our self-worth.

We self-pity ourselves and fall into a downward spiral of low self-esteem and self-doubt.

Making a list of all the good qualities in you and recognizing it helps you feel better about yourself.

You may also go a little extra with this practice and write a page of self-praise.

Talking to a friend and asking him/her to list out some of the qualities they like about you may also help you see your own qualities.

We all should have a set of friends whom we can rely on at such moments.

You can also do the same when they are down. Lift them up and let them lift you up as well.

10. Practicing gratitude helps you stay positive when dealing with heartbreak

When our heart is broken it is only natural for us to become negative and we fail to appreciate the wonderful things that we already have.

At such times you need to deliberately count your blessings.

Practicing gratitude is one of the quickest ways to make a shift in your mood.

Just recognizing all the beautiful things that you already possess can make you feel much lighter and positive.

Being thankful for what you have makes you feel more secure and positive in life and especially during heartbreak.

“So mesmerized was I by the moon that it was only on a new moon night that I noticed how beautifully the stars had adorned the sky.”

11. Let go of everything and surrender yourself

With surrender comes liberty

The universe is a sophisticated place. You cannot expect it to work according to your desires but you sure can trust that it will take care of you.

Whatever happens to us is not in our control. You may as well let it be.

How you react to it is all in your hands.

Surrender all your pain and suffering to the superior one (could be the deity you worship or the universe in general).

You don’t have to take revenge or plot anything. Just surrender yourself and cast all your pain unto the universe and the universe shall take care of you. It always does.

You just focus on your growth and your work at hand and leave everything to the master planner.

Just love yourself and let your love reach everyone.

If you want to know more about how you can harness the power of surrender in your life you can also read The Power of Surrender.

My message to you

Have faith in yourself and the good energy that is there in this universe. You will be and in fact you are taken care of.

Lastly, This too shall pass.

I sincerely hope that post has helped you feel better. I have used the above methods myself and it has worked for me, so I hope it works for you as well.

Letting go and healing is a slow process, and you may get triggered by the same incident in future again.

But the intensity of the hit will get less and less as time passes by.

As for your immediate relief you can try the above.

Thank you and have a peaceful day ahead.

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